At the Inauguration.

My wife, daughter, and I came back from DC last night. Yes, I was there when history was made. Among the armies of the flag-waving hopeful, I was somewhere mixed in. Yes, it was cold. I couldn't feel my toes. And I despise large crowds. 2 million people is a large crowd. But for a brief moment I felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders; the moment when we got a new Commander in Chief. I didn't cry, but man was happy.

Anyway, now that I'm back, I'd like to recap what I learned.

1. 2 million people can make a very, very large mess.

2. If you ever go to a presidential inauguration, make sure it's at least 35 degrees.

3. In spite of the bitter cold, people don't have the common sense to put on a pair of winter boots/shoes. The Smithsonian Institution had to help the Red Cross with victims of frostbite and hypothermia. I would guess that, by noticing the numbers of people wearing sandals and clogs, and the lack of gloves, it's no wonder people were being treated.

4. If you're at the Metro, stand far away from the rail, lest you play chicken with an oncoming train. A 68 year-old woman victoriously escaped the jaws of death after nearly being crushed.

5. Even among the winds of change, leave it to a bunch of fundamentalists to try to destroy the mood. Apparently, if you voted for Barack Obama you're going to hell. I'm screwed. I'm guessing that they conveniently forgot Daniel 2:21, Daniel 4:17, Daniel 5:21, John 19:11, Romans 13:1, and 1 Peter 2:13-17. I suppose they're willing to give God a pass for voting for Obama.

6. If you don't like people jeering at your appearance, don't be a dick. In spite of what this article says, there weren't a "few" protesters at the inauguration, there were 2 million of them. Trust me.

7. Only Aretha Franklin can wear whatever the hell she wants, no matter how silly, and make it look cool.