Wednesday, January 14, 2009

The History Channel annoys me!

As if drivel about the end of the world and the Second Coming weren't enough, the History Channel takes one more step toward complete idiocy.

As I type this, I'm watching an episode of The Universe, called "Alien Faces". The premise of this episode is to shed light on what life might be like on other planets. I'm sure that you might be thinking, "What could you possibly have against the History Channel?" Let's look at an excerpt, shall we?

This particular episode has David Aguilar, a respected astronomer with an impressive list of credentials to his name. The narrator and Aguilar begin to talk about lifeforms on a fictional planet called AG-143. Not only that, but they begin to call these lifeforms by name, like the sargun and the moblant.

Says Aguilar:
"At first sight you might almost mistake a moblant for a starfish. It has stubby little arms that it moves across the desert, but the odd thing about these arms is they have long tentacles that probe the sand for pockets of water that may be hidden. And the odd thing about this creature is if it finds a large, large pocket of water, it begins pulling the water up like it's pulling it up a well. And it grows in size, and it grows in size, and it stores the water like a camel does."
All the while, he keeps a straight face as if this were an irrefutable fact.

*rolling fingers on desk*

I don't know about you, but I'm within inches of boycotting The History Channel, TDC, and TLC altogether. They've blurred the line between science fact and science fiction so much that you can't tell the difference. I don't watch TDC to watch Bear Grylls chomping on an eyeball of an ill-fated yak, nor do I watch TLC for some sexist, egomaniacal, sycophantic control freak polluting the gene pool.


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